Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Pubwoof's List of Grievances

What a great idea this is....

1)Corporate Elitists. Safely amongst the most despicable people alive. They represent greed, sloth, pride, gluttony, et.al., and are the primary movers behind virtually everything else we consider to be public/social ills --corruption, hegemony, constitutional abuses, war crimes, et.al. People who "make" money simply because they have money and because they spend money to grease politicians represent the absolute pinnacle of the entitlement culture.

2)Joe the Plumber. The third-class intellect who barged into the national discourse when he miserably failed to ambush Obama on tax policy during a photo op. His misrepresentations about himself, his shameless and moronic shilling for the McCain ticket, and his later attempts to land himself a country music deal showed that one doesn't have to run for office to be entirely full of shit. What a disgrace. What good was he other than post-Palin proof that any fool can become the darling of the GOP?

3)Brazilian Beer Barons. Over the years, the STL has lost many companies because they got bought out by bigger fish from other cities. However much those losses sucked, it was always comforting to know A-B would always be a STL icon. This one hurts me more because A-B never started planning to defend a hostile takeover until it came and because InBev got off on the cheap because of the weak dollar. It's like it never needed to happen. Damn.

4)The Rams. This year, I shall call you "The Lambs." I have nothing brilliant to say except it's just damn sad. I guess it's a shame too. Like, get better please. Sad.

5)"Real Americans". Anyone who considers themselves this cannot be a patriot. To believe that some parts of America, or that some Americans, are any more or less legitimately American is to disregard the essential wisdoms of our founding fathers that we are all equal and all that bullshit. If the mark of a patriot is the flying of flags or the sporting of pins, they should display the stars alone or the stripes alone to serve as a visual aid in explaining which parts of America don't count and why. The whole lot of them can go fuck themselves.

I have more, but I'm going to hold them deep deep inside me until they become suffciently hateful and twisted to be shared publicly.


S. City said...

Thats a great list, Pubwoof! You obviously put more thought into that I did:[

Anonymous said...

Pubwoof, you are one right thinkin' kind of guy. And by right, I mean left, and by left I mean correct. Cheers!


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